March 22, 2009 · Uncategorized

My husband and I were discussing today how much the month of March sucks.  It’s cold, crappy and just when you think the snow is gone for good, you get one more visit from the white stuff.  Sure you get those oddball warm days that remind you just how much you miss t-shirt weather, but then the next day its freezing again.

I want to be able to wear flip flops again.  I’m sick of wearing sneakers and boots all the time.  Mostly because no matter how many I own, I can never seem to find a matched pair of socks.  It’s pathetic that the hardest part of my morning routine is managing to locate socks.  Even after laundry day the pick-ins are slim.

It doesn’t help that the one pair of socks that I have no trouble finding are completely useless.  They are pedicure socks (don’t even ask where they came from because I have no idea) that don’t cover your toes.  They mock me with their deficiencies.  Flaunting the fact that they manage to be the only completed pair in my drawer.  Balled up inside themselves giving the appearance of a regular pair of white socks, only to reveal their true selves after I’ve done a sock selection victory dance.

I don’t know why I have so many issues keeping socks together.  Granted, I do have a hard time making sure the worn socks wind up in the hamper (mostly because I have a tendency to just kick them off while in bed, watching TV or sitting at the desk).  But when I go on a sock retrieval mission prior to laundry day, I leave no ottoman unturned in my quest.

Perhaps the Underpants Gnomes have focused their efforts on stealing single socks, just to mess with us. I think it would fill the missing link in their plan for profit.

Step 1: Steal single sock.
Step 2: Sell sock back to original owner.
Step 3: Profit!

It’s a much more complete plan than their underpants stealing scheme which left step two with merely a “?”.

If anyone happens to find a gnome selling a single orange and white argyle please send them my way.  In the mean time I’ll hold out for flip flop weather.

The original plan is clearly flawed leaving them no choice but to steal socks.

The original plan is clearly flawed leaving them no choice but to steal socks.

Written by admin


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